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Trying to Achieve a 'Balanced Life' Always Makes Me Feel Off Balance. How About an Integrated Life?

August 31, 2011

I've Been Thinking

Trying to Achieve a 'Balanced Life' Always Makes Me Feel Off Balance. How About an Integrated Life?

By Maria Shriver

I've been thinking lately about the idea of living a balanced life. Everybody I talk to seems to be struggling in their lives with this mythical thing called balance. It always just seems out of reach, particularly for women. Truthfully, I believe the whole concept sets us all up for failure.

Based on a friend's suggestion, I'm going to forget about balance and try to lead what I'm referring to as an integrated life.

I hosted a barbecue recently where I had my kids and their friends, family friends, personal friends and professional friends all mingling together. It was wonderful having all those different ages, experiences and relationships melded together. It felt real. It felt right.

Like many of you, I get in the habit of putting aspects of my life (family, personal, professional) into compartments and then trying to attend to all of them equally, at different times. That kind of balance is impossible, so I thought: why not bring my whole wide world together more often? I'd prefer look at my life as a whole, not as segregated parts that I need to juggle or balance on some life seesaw. I think the pursuit of integration could bring us much more joy than the pursuit of balance.

What do you think about the idea of living an integrated life as opposed to a balanced life?

I'd love to hear your thoughts below. Join the conversation.

- Maria

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