TGIF: Letting Go of “Good Day Vs. Bad Day” Thinking in 4 Steps

If someone asked you to reflect on your current life situation right now and to describe it in a few words, what would you say? I ask this question for many reasons, but what I really want to know is how many of you would instantly answer, “My life is good,” or “My life is actually going quite badly.”

Going through life changes can be hard as hell. One moment life is going very smoothly, and then the next thing you know, you feel like the floor beneath you has been pulled out, and you don’t know where you are going to land. You can call it uncertainty or the contrast of life, but I believe we should all agree that no matter how we slice it, change is always going to be a given. How we handle change has a lot to do with how we’ve trained our minds to look at our daily perspective of what is considered a “good day” and what is considered a “bad day.”

Dealing with the difference of good and bad days is something I took very sensitively for a long time. I considered myself to be a very black-and white person. Whether that came to decision making, how I felt about somebody, how I reflected on the outcome of my daily life… I was the type of person that never liked a “maybe” or an “I don’t know.” For me, being so clear-cut made me feel stronger, like I was a guy that knew exactly what he wanted, when he wanted it, and how he wanted it. (That kind of thinking was very “Scorpio” of me — if you are into astrology, you can appreciate that.) However, what I’ve learned through my own self reflection and how I dealt with my personal journey of ups, downs, and sideway turns is that categorizing whether my day was good or bad day affected my energy and controlled my expectations.

[Why Does Everyone Hate Mondays? 5 Tips to Embrace the New Week]

You see, I thought if I woke up telling myself today was going to be positive and that I went through my day with happy intentions, I would have a good day.

That was my black-and-white spiritual version of controlling my day. Well, as you may know, life does not work like that. What we do know is that there is never really anything that is solidly consistent in the outside world that we can 100% control. We can absolutely wake up every day and strive to be good people, we can choose to eat healthier, we can go to work on time, pay our bills, go to the gym, etc. Those are the type of choices we can make to boost our happy emotions and make for a responsibly positive life. With that said, the unexpected hiccups that happen out of the blue can allow our state of calm to turn into feelings of anxiety and “WTF” moments. For many people, such moments can immediately take ahold and leave you choosing to think and say you are having “a bad day.”

My message to you is to let go of focusing on what is considered to be good and what is considered to be a bad day. Life is going to have grey moments where there are going to be a blended mix of days that have flickers of greatness and sparks of struggles. Truly owning that vision allows your mind to let go of what you can and cannot control along with handling any big or small situations with a stronger sense of peace.

[Use the Power of Positivity to Make Someone’s Day]

It is about tapping into that part of your soul where you let go and know that every day is going to be an adventure and there is no point in putting a stamp or label on it.

Here are few tips I wanted to share with you that really helped guide me into letting go of that black and white perspective:

  • Don’t rush your feelings. It is absolutely wonderful and empowering to use the words “yes” and “no.” However, it is just as strong to tell someone, or have a thought with an, “I don’t have an opinion on that right now” or “I’m not sure yet.” Allowing yourself to have uncertainty lets go of the pressure to immediately have a feeling.
  • Let go of expectations. Say goodbye to what you think your day is going to be like. Each day is going to be different that is what you can expect.
  • Keep up with the positivity. Definitely concentrate and feed into the positive. Focusing on what is making you smile certainly helps with digesting the challenging moments of your day.
  • Keep the faith. Having faith (whatever that may be) and feeding into the guidance of that makes the thought of a really “bad day” seem not so bad at all.

[Read Maria Shriver’s latest ‘I’ve Been Thinking’ essay]

My wish for you is that this article provokes your thinking on how you look at your daily life. My philosophy comes from a place where positive thinking rules, but at the same token, you hold a strong sense of awareness that those unexpected downfalls of life are going to happen. It is about allowing your mind to not give those challenging moments any more of your power or energy that it deserves. And, knowing that whatever comes your way – you handle it and look forward to an even more mindfully charged tomorrow.

Peace and Gratitude,
Matt Jacobi


{Image credit: Padurariu Alexandru, Unsplash}

 

About the Author

author image

Matt Jacobi is Writer and Creative Content Director where he leads a team in developing thought provoking social media campaigns. He has been a voice of truth on various world topics such as women's rights, religion, bullying and equality. His current mission is to get more men to stand with women so that they can work together to make equality more of a reality. Jacobi was inspired to be an advocate for women's rights since the birth of his two nieces.Recently, Jacobi worked side by side with international entrepreneurs traveling the globe and assisting in bringing their various brands to life. This experience allowed him to work along New York City's top publishing company, Simon & Schuster and PR powerhouse, Rubenstein Public Relations.Jacobi started his career in media after graduating from Arizona State University where he landed his first job at ABC News in Phoenix, Arizona. He later made the move to Hollywood where he worked at the celebrity news show, E! News. Shortly after, The Style Network went on to feature him in a television wedding special capturing his lifestyle expertise. Jacobi continued his on-camera career as a television personality where he starred in reality show hits such as, E!'s Giuliana & Bill and The Drama Queen.

Read more from Matt Jacobi

Sign Up for MariaShriver.com's Weekly Must-Read

More Posts from Architects of Change