15 Things You Must Give Up to Be Happy: The Final 3 Steps

Luminita Saviuc Happy

This exclusive series is from 15 THINGS YOU SHOULD GIVE UP TO BE HAPPY: An Inspiring Guide to Discovering Effortless Joy based on Luminita D. Saviuc’s original list on PurposeFairy.com of things to let go of in order to be happy. The list went viral—it was shared more than one million times and counting, and was called “the most viral self-development article in the history of the internet.”

[Find out what #1-12 are here.] 

 

13. Give Up the Need to Impress Others

“People who want the most approval get the least and people who need approval the least get the most.” ~ Wayne Dyer

We live in a world that teaches us to look for external love and approval—a world that teaches us that in order for us to feel truly happy, we have to try hard to ompress those around us by behaving in certain ways, and by surrounding ourselves with all kinds of expensive and shiny things. But happiness can never come from trying to impress others, but rather from being real and authentic.

  1. The Only Person You Should Aspire to Impress Is Yourself

Your job here on earth is not to spend your life impressing those around you. Your job is to be yourself, authentically and unapologetically.

  1. You Alone Are Enough

You were born whole and perfect, and who you are underneath it all never stopped being whole and perfect. You really don`t need to add anything to your life, or get any more love and approval from those around you, in order for you to feel this way. You already are enough.

[Are You Trying Too Hard to Please Other People? 3 Ways to Be Authentically Yourself]

  1. An Original Is Worth More Than a Copy

Authenticity is what we all treasure, what we all value. And when you live your life from a place of truth and integrity, focusing on being the best version of yourself, and sharing who you truly are with the rest of the world, that’s when you begin to shine and that’s when people start being drawn to you.

  1. It’s Called Self-Worth, Not Others’ Worth

Never get your sense of worth from outside yourself. Never fall into the trap of thinking that who you are is not enough and that you need other people’s approval, love and validation in order to feel that you’re of value. Never allow external things, places, people and circumstances to determine or tell you how much you’re worth. It’s called self-worth, not others’ worth.

 

14. Give Up Labels

“Do not hover always on the surface of things, nor take up suddenly with mere appearances; but penetrate into the depth of matters, as far as your time and circumstances allow.” ~ Isaac Watts

The use of labels creates a veil in front of our eyes, impairing our sight and causing us to see the world as either black or white, good or bad, rich or poor, worthy or unworthy. But you and I know that there’s more to life than meets the eye.

  1. Our Place Is Not in a “Box”

People, places and experiences aren’t meant to be labeled and judged, they are meant to be loved and appreciated, since deep down inside, the nature we all share is love, light and happiness.

  1. Labels Deny You the Right to Realize Your True Nature

Your true nature is fluid and expansive, constantly growing and constantly evolving. And by using all kinds of rigid concepts and labels to define yourself and others, conforming to strict ideas of who you are and of who everyone else is, you deny yourself  the right to realize you true nature. And you deny people the right to become all that life intended them to become.

[Whatever… Love Is Love: Questioning the Labels We Give Ourselves]

  1. Focus on the Depth More Than the Surface

There is much more to each and every one of us than our name, gender, religion, past, occupation, material possessions, and the many categorical and stereotypical labels that the world around us has placed on us. There is much more to life than what we see at first glance. And by looking beyond appearances, by focusing on the depths more than on the surface, you’ll know, and experience this truth.

 

15. Give Up Attachment

“As human beings we all want to be happy and free from misery . . . we have learned that the key to happiness is inner peace. The greatest obstacles to inner peace are disturbing emotions such as anger, attachment, fear and suspicion, while love and compassion and a sense of universal responsibility are the sources of peace and happiness.” ~ Dalai Lama

When we hold on too tightly to everything and everyone, desperately trying to cling to things, people, places and experiences, we take the life out of them, and we take the life out of our own life.

Happiness can never come from attachment to transitory things. It can only come from letting go. Freedom can never come from clinging. It can only come from giving up attachment.

[The Secret Ingredient to a More Fulfilled Life…]

  1. Nothing in Life Is Yours to Keep

Nothing in life is yours to keep—not your children, not your friends and family, not your lover, not your material possessions, not your youth and vitality, not your struggles (which is great news) or successes, not your body and not even your life. Everything in life is given to you for a short period of time, to enjoy, to learn from, to appreciate and to love, but never to keep.

  1. Everything Changes

Things, people, and experiences all come and go. Everything changes, nothing remains the same, and the more you resist this truth, the more you try to control the natural course of life by clinging to transitory things, the more complicated your life will get and the more you will continue to suffer.

  1. Let Nature Be Your Teacher

Allow nature to be your wise friend, teacher and trusted companion, to teach you more about the infinite circle of life,  about love and about letting go. Look outside in nature for evidence of decay, destruction, death,, rebirth, rejuvenation and renewal. And remind yourself that you too are part of nature. That you too are going through these natural stages.

[Read Maria Shriver’s latest ‘I’ve Been Thinking’ essay]

  1. Release All Grasping and Let Love In

Love yourself. Love your life, your friends and family, your work and your living environment. Love and appreciate the many things, people and experiences that life sends your way, but don’t try to cling to them. Keep yourself, your relationships and your whole life free from bondage, and when the time comes to let go, when life asks you to let go, do so with grace. Let love teach you that happiness will never come from possessing, from clinging or from holding on to impermanence, but only from letting go. Fill your heart with love. Give up and be happy!


{Image credit: Alexandra Seinet, Unsplash}

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