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Don’t Hate on Love


Don’t Hate on Love


I am a sucker when it comes to Valentine’s Day.

The balloons, the candlelit dinners, the lovey-dovey messages…they all totally get my heart beating. Yes, I love this holiday that’s filled with chocolate heart boxes, cupid-shaped cards, and stunning red roses. In fact, I turn to utter mush when it comes to anything romance. Romance is my kryptonite, and it always has been.

For all of you single peeps out there, let me stop you before you click over to another article on the Internet. My goal here is not to turn you off. My goal instead is to open your mind and help you realize that responding negatively to February 14th will not do you any favors.

Allow me to inspire you with a small dose of my “gay best friend” words of wisdom for a moment…

You see, I know that Valentine’s Day is not all about that fluffy pink and red commercial stuff. If you actually read up on the history of this holiday, then you will learn that the overall essence of it is derived from the celebration of love. That’s why I believe that there is an “A-ha light bulb” lesson to be learned from Valentine’s Day and the way you react to it.

Look, I’ve obviously been alone on Valentine’s Day before myself. We’ve all been there, and it is not the best feeling in the world. However, over time I have noticed that a lot of people go out of their way to hate on February 14. You’ve seen those not-so-nice Facebook posts. The snarky articles. The cheeky Instagram quotes.

This type of negative energy doesn’t help anyone, especially ourselves. That’s why I believe that shifting our perspective on this day is so important. In fact, I believe that if you shift your reactions to Valentine’s Day and aim to have a more compassionate mindset, then it will create a higher feeling of positive energy within yourself that will carry out into your everyday life.

Today,  I want to share a few insightful tips to improve your perspective on Valentine’s Day. Adjusting your attitude about this holiday will not only help yourself. It might also help you onto the path to finding a healthy relationship of your own.

Complaining Gets You Nowhere
Bitter Betty’s party of one? Your table is ready. What is moaning and complaining going to do or change in making your Valentine’s Day any better? Saying “I’m single once again this year” is consciously sending a signal to your brain to feel depressed. Instead of concentrating on what you don’t have (like a significant other), why not affirm that you woke up healthy, with a job, friends, family and a purpose for life. You know that famous quote, “Gratitude turns what you have into enough…” well post it on your bathroom mirror that day. Having gratitude for the areas of your life that are working out great should be a given. A partner to share them with only heightens that feeling of gratitude. So, for right now replace your complaining with being grateful.

Don’t Hate on Happiness
If seeing other couples happy makes you ill, then you’ve got a bigger problem than just Valentine’s Day. Being jealous, envious, and giving the evil eye to other people shows that you have some kind of anger issue to conquer. You should want to see other people in happy situations. Truly, grounded people only wish good for others. Besides, relationships and marriage is a whole other job. Instead of hating on them, why not give them an imaginary “thumbs up” for finding each other and making it work? You may be surprised by how your mind feels when you say, “Good for them!” instead of “Ugh, get a room!”

Avoid the “Why Not Me?” Questions
True love really rocks, and I think everyone deserves to experience the feeling of it. If you are asking yourself, “Why am I single?” I challenge you to ask yourself “Am I happy?” instead. People are attracted to happiness and success. And by success, I mean living a life where you feel fulfilled and like you have a sense of purpose. People pick up on that emotion. So, if there is something that is bringing you down in life, why not first concentrate on changing that? That situation may be what is subconsciously pulling you away from expressing love and showing that you are at a point of peace in your life. In order to accept love into your life, you need to actually love what is happening in your daily life.

Don’t Give Up
If you are a real believer in love, then don’t make Valentine’s Day be about “not having” someone. If you are receptive and open to being in love, then you will have it one day. It is not about “finding” it. It is about love coming into your life at the right moment. Don’t allow outside negativity to cloud your belief and dreams when it comes to loving another person. If you want it — if you are ready for it — then it will enter your life.

I am going to close this article with something my fiancé and I think about each time Valentine’s Day rolls around. After the Supreme Court Ruling on marriage equality a few summers ago, it allowed for each and every one one of us to celebrate love legally. We will never forget that day for the rest of our lives. It is days like Valentine’s Day that remind us how we get to toast to our love and never take it for granted.

And, for everyone else out there that wants love in their life, please never stop believing in love. I hope you can see Valentine’s Day as not just a couple’s holiday, but as a day when the power of love is celebrated.

With Gratitude,
Matt Jacobi

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Matt Jacobi is a writer and COO for an award-winning creative agency. Jacobi has been a voice of truth on various world topics such as women’s rights, religion, mental health, bullying and equality. His current mission is to get more men to stand with women so that they can work together to make equality more of a reality. Jacobi was inspired to be an advocate for women’s rights since the birth of his two nieces.

Jacobi previously worked side by side with international entrepreneurs traveling the globe and assisting in bringing their various brands to life. This experience allowed him to work alongside New York City’s top publishing company, Simon & Schuster and PR powerhouse, Rubenstein Public Relations.

His earlier career began in television after graduating from Arizona State University where he landed his first job at ABC News in Phoenix, Arizona. He later made the move to Hollywood where he worked at the celebrity news show, E! News. Shortly after, The Style Network went on to feature him in a television wedding special capturing his lifestyle expertise. Jacobi continued his on-camera career as a television personality where he starred in two reality shows for the E! Network.

You can follow his daily adventures by visiting



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