Finally Deciding You’re Good Enough Can Quietly Change the World
There have been a few bleak seasons in my 46 years, starting at a young age, when I wanted to opt out of life. Disappear quietly. I knew I could never keep up or measure up and that I didn’t have what it takes.
What I hadn’t learned yet, or not fully, was that I do not have to bend and twist myself to fit an arbitrary mold. I do not have to be smarter or prettier, less sensitive or more capable than I already am.
I am gifted and I matter. And so do you.
We celebrate the folks doing extraordinary things – changing the world in monumental ways (and rightly so!). We put people on pedestals and hold them up as shining examples of what might be. As a result, some of us live with intense shame that we will never measure up and maybe we don’t even want to!
Self-awareness breeds self-compassion and one day, after decades of struggle and numbing and wishing myself away, it occurred to me that I could choose to embrace my mediocrity. My “good enough.” I realized with a start and acute grief for all the years I had wasted, that I could shake off the shackles of comparison, shame, and perfectionism and refuse to hold myself up to an impossible standard.
I decided I am enough. In all my brokenness and my humble craftsmanship, I am enough.
Still, I fight for wholeness and daily make the conscious choice to love myself – all my beautiful and my broken bits. And as I fill up on truth and do the work to heal, I drip compassion through all my cracks and jagged edges and help water a thirsty world.
I become a quiet world changer.
Deciding I am good enough makes space for me to do small things. To step out and just offer my small gifts so that I can do the work I feel called to.
Deciding I am enough allows me to show up with curiosity and joy and step fully present into my ordinary, imperfect and beautiful life.
Finally deciding I am good enough means instead of hiding and waiting for other people to do hard things I take personal responsibility and use my words and life to help build the world I want to live in.
Because millions of ordinary people intent on building and creating, small step by small step, will undoubtedly change the world.
When I am anxious or afraid – and the unworthiness or stories of not being good enough surface again – I remind myself that I am rooted in the truth that I do not have to pay rent for the space I take up in this world. I have nothing to prove.
And what happens is that this freedom to just be me permits me to freely give. This freedom woos me away from fear and lack into joyful possibility. This freedom makes me determined to reach out my hand and lift up as many other weary people as I am able and make a safe space for them to realize they deserve to be here too.
I use my small gifts to quietly change the world. I want you to use your small gifts too.
And if we struggle or fall, if people don’t like what we offer, if sometimes we run right back to numbing and hide out under the covers for a little while, this does not disqualify us from life. If we wrestle and hurt and take two steps forward and another one back, and we cannot always see how we make any difference at all, still we offer up our voices or ask for help but we do not quit.
And maybe it is in being real and imperfect and showing up anyways that we offer hope and encouragement to each other and this is, perhaps, one of the most extravagant gifts of all.
Finally deciding you’re good enough can quietly change the world.
To read more from Krista O’Reilly Davi-Digui, visit her blog, “A Life in Progress.”
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Krista is a stubborn questioner, honest storyteller & Joyful Living Educator. Her mission is to help women live unshackled lives of purpose, health & JOY. She’d love to connect with you at alifeinprogress.ca or on Facebook.