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I’ve Been Thinking…Knowing When to Heal

When it comes to healing emotionally and mentally, it can be difficult at times to even know where to begin. Knowing where to start unraveling years of being hurt by the words and actions of those around us can be a daunting task.

I always suggest to my clients, to start with now. There really is no need to go digging around in the past, upsetting yourself. Allow daily life to bring the past up to you. If there are emotional wounds within you, they will reveal themselves by disturbing your inner peace. Begin to use whatever bothers you as a sign post pointing you to something that needs your healing attention.

What is happening in your world right now that causes you to become disturbed, upset, or causes you to overreact?

An overreaction is one of the most significant signs that a past hurt or unresolved trauma has surfaced for healing. An overreaction is those moments where you say to yourself. “I have no idea why that upset me so much. I logically know that it wasn’t that big of a deal, but it really angered and/or upset me. I just couldn’t let it go. I thought about it the whole day.”

If you hear yourself thinking or speaking those words, you have found a great starting point for your emotional healing.

Who or what part of you is having the overreaction? In emotional and mental healing work, you are not working with your logical adult self but rather another part of your personality that I refer to as your inner child. Healing comes when you as the adult are able to build a relationship of love and trust with this inner child aspect of yourself by:

  1. Creating a daily practice of recognizing when your inner child has become upset.You will know this by how you feel and by recognizing you are having upset, distracting, and obsessive thoughts inside your mind.
  2. Deal with it now, not later.Putting it off only prolongs the amount of time you are in suffering instead of peace.
  3. Learn how to talk with this inner child. Allow the upset voice in your head to speak freely and childishly about what is upsetting it.
  4. Help the child find a belief or thought that makes it feel more safe than it’s current perception of the situation.

You will know when healing has occurred because you will begin to feel relief and relaxation within your body and the mind will release the obsessive thought.

Healing is an ongoing process. It is a daily awareness of what is going on within you and then taking on the responsibility of parenting and therefore healing your own inner child each and every day. The more you are able to calm the child and keep it calm, the more and more evidence of emotional healing you will see. Your reactions and interactions with life will become more calm and pleasant and less and less dramatic and out of control. Knowing yourself, exploring how your inner child thinks and what it believes about every person and situation in it’s world is the key to obtaining deep inner peace and lasting emotional healing.

Angie Johnsey

To learn more about Angie, go to

This essay was featured in the May 20th edition of The Sunday Paper, Maria Shriver’s free weekly newsletter for people with passion and purpose. To get inspiring and informative content like this piece delivered straight to your inbox each Sunday morning, click here to subscribe.




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