6 Ways to Claim Your Worthiness
Worthiness is an inside job. It’s not based on external circumstances. You create the belief and feelings that will help elevate the circumstances.
But first, before you claim your worthiness you need to understand if you’re feeling unworthy. How do you know if you’re feeling this way? Here’s what to look for:
- You settle for less than you deserve.
- You are afraid to say “No” and therefore often give others priority over your time.
- You focus more on what others think of you than what you think of yourself.
- You expect to be disappointed rather than pleased.
- You are not paid your worth and do not ask for proper compensation.
- You do not allow yourself to receive.
- You over-give and attract takers.
- You stay small versus risking expressing your greatness. (You’re afraid to stand out.)
It is important to remember that claiming your worthiness comes with nurturing WHO you are, not what you do. I ask my clients to find a picture of themselves as a young child, maybe age 3 to 6, and place it by their bedside or somewhere they can see and talk to it. This allows you to love that child—which is you—back into innate greatness.
Now, to claim—or reclaim—your worthiness, follow these six steps:
- Treat yourself with love and compassion, not judgment. Know that you did nothing wrong for not feeling worthy. This is a universal feeling for many.
- Ask yourself: What would your life look like if you knew you were worthy? Create a vision board of the ways life will manifest when you know you are worthy.
- Repeat this statement with vigilance daily: “I allow myself to know I am worthy.” It is best to say it in the first five minutes in the morning and last five minutes before bed (and even a few times during the day).
- Have patience and commitment: You must continually monitor your inner chatter and repeat the above statement for a minimum of 63 days in a row. (Leading neuroscientists with whom I’ve trained believe it takes this long to change a belief. I believe it can take longer or shorter depending on your circumstances.)
- Give yourself at least 20 minutes a day of “me” time. That time can be spent meditating, sitting looking at the clouds with a cup of green tea, or anything that gives you peace. This simple act of being and “not doing” teaches your brain that you are worthy of this alone time, and deserve to be a priority.
- Jot down evidence of how worthiness is showing up in your life. Look for upgrades in your life—Are you dating people who appreciate and see you? Are you working in a job where you are valued? Do you have more balance between work and play in your life to feel fulfilled and grounded? The physical act of writing down the evidence trains the brain to look for more.
Remember, this claiming or reclaiming your worthiness takes time and patience. It also requires daily vigilance of monitoring your thoughts, noticing ways you are enough “as is” (not by how society or others define you based on externals), and then taking inspiring actions empowered from within.
And for parents: To help raise children to grow up feeling worthy, take time to be fully present to them—to truly see, hear, acknowledge and validate your children and their feelings.
To get a little help visualizing your most worthy life, check out my free guided meditation at www.claimyourworthiness.com.