New Mom Katherine Schwarzenegger Pratt Talks to Three Incredible Women About Motherhood
Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted to be a mom. I remember having playdates when I was little and all I wanted to do was play “house.” My friends and I would each grab a baby-doll, pretend we were their moms and reenact what we saw our parents doing throughout their days.
I remember being in middle school and having a playdate with a longtime friend of mine and asking her to go play “house” with me and she responded “why do you always want to play house? It’s so boring!” I still—to this day—have no idea why she thought playing with my lifelike doll that you could bottle feed and diaper change because it peed and pooed was boring, but whatever.
Growing up, I always watched my mom be a mother with such grace and joy. It was like she floated with perfection always. She had four kids under the age of eight, a career, a husband and so many other moving parts. Yet, when she was with us kids, it’s like nothing else mattered. Only we mattered. We were the center of her world, all she focused on, and joy oozed out of her. We felt loved, cared for, nurtured, and safe to be completely ourselves always.
Nine months ago, I became a mother—and my mom became a grandmother. I have never felt so sure of a new role or moment in my life than when I was handed my daughter. When I became a mother, I felt like everything in my life had led me right to that baby being put on my chest, and it was perfect. Mom is the title I have always wanted and the role that I have looked forward to for as long as I can remember. Embarking on this new chapter of motherhood allowed for a new blossoming of a part of my relationship with my own mother. She was the first person to meet our daughter and it was a moment I will never forget. To watch her step into the role of grandmother has been one of the greatest joys of my life—and let me tell you, she is just as perfect, playful and fun at being a grandmother as you can imagine.
Check out my BDA Baby conversation with my mom where we talk about raising us kids and her new role as grandma below
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My mom has always—and still does every day—love the heck out of her kids and her pseudo kids (of which she has many). She is happiest when all four of us are around her laughing, eating, watching silly (some say stupid) movies or having deep conversations on walks, which usually end with her getting fired up about how she can continue to change the world. All of us would rather hang and travel with our mom over anything or anyone else. Even as adults who have our own lives, we all find ourselves continuing to come home to our mama.
Anyone who has had the pleasure of being around my mom knows that she is the mother of all mothers. She is the mom you want to learn from, watch, be like, and soak up. You want to be as fun, funny, organized, relaxed, thrilled, joy-filled, disciplined, structured, loving, caring, accepting and good, as she is.
I have always had an immense amount of respect for my mom, but since becoming a mother myself, my respect and admiration for her is out of this world. I ask her questions every single day, not just about motherhood, but about marriage, work, friendships, parenting and so much more. I know how lucky I am to have her.
As I sit here on my first Mother’s Day, I feel so grateful to be a mama to my little Lyla Maria, and I am filled with so much gratitude for my own mama and now grandmama. I hope to be half as perfect of a mother as she is. I hope to mother with as much grace and joy as she does. I hope to raise kids to feel as loved and as accepted as she has with me and my siblings. I hope to also be calm when she tries to keep Lyla awake through her naps, sneak her sweets, and let her teeth on the dining table.
Mom, you are the greatest mother and the most fun grandmother already (you know this based on the face of pure JOY and HUGE smile you get whenever Lyla sees you). Lyla Maria is the luckiest and today you can have her to yourself. (Just kidding, I’ll be in the other room listening closely for anything urgent.)
This has been a wild time to become a mother during a pandemic, but the silver lining has been having quality time with my daughter, realizing how strong we are as women to be able to grow and nurture a baby, and getting to watch my husband and family step into their new roles as Lyla has entered this world.
For all you first time mamas, cheers to you on this first Mother’s Day! No one before us can say they became a mama for the first time in one of the world’s worst pandemics, or had our doctor appointments shielded without our partners, or pushed a baby out while masked. And although it may feel and seem that everything went wrong over the past year, one thing went right, and that was you becoming a mother.
Happy Mother’s Day to all you mamas out there! And thank you to the mamas who shared their thoughts on becoming first-time moms and first-time moms of multiples on this Mother’s Day!
GABY DALKIN, mom to Poppy
What’s been the biggest surprise about motherhood so far?
How much your baby changes on a daily basis! It’s wild to watch them progress both physically and mentally and so much changes within 24 hours.
What is something your mother taught you that you hope to pass along to your child?
To be a happy and productive member of society and their community.
Describe being a mom in one word…
Omg, that’s almost impossible! I’d say being a mom is all-encompassing, overwhelming and the most rewarding job in the world.
What does this day mean to you and how do you plan to celebrate?
It’s a bittersweet day for me because on one hand, I am so thrilled that I am finally a mom and get to spend the day with my daughter and snuggle in mommy/daughter bliss. But on the other hand, I know how hard this day was for me while we were going through our recurrent miscarriages, so my heart goes out to everyone who is struggling to get to where they want to be in their fertility journey.
CIARA, mom to Future, Win, and Sienna
What’s been the biggest surprise about motherhood so far?
I would say that while being a mom can be incredibly complex and tedious, it’s actually quite easy! I think we have a special gift as women that’s innate—it’s in us. I remember my mom telling me before becoming a mom, “you’ll be prepared for it, everything works out, and you will create the best course that works for you for parenting” and that is true. With having three kids, there are definitely some days that are hard and challenging, but because of the indescribable love I have for my babies, it’s easy.
What is something your mother taught you that you hope to pass along to your child?
My mother has taught me the importance of independence. I think that’s so important as women, that we have independence. No matter the circumstance, I think it’s something powerful about a woman that can hold it down on her own, and always carry that mentality throughout life. That’s been a big goal of mine and it’s always been part of my drive and my why. I feel empowered through my independence!
Describe being a mom in one word…
POWERFUL.
What does this day mean to you and how do you plan to celebrate?
This day is a beautiful day and one I always look forward to, and to be honest, I love the simplicity of being with my family and feeling that love. I also let my husband do the planning, so I never know what he has up his sleeve, but I am always looking forward to that special time with him and my babies. I also have to say it’s a great day to celebrate my mom and my grandma and my girls that are also mothers. It’s been so beautiful to see how we all power through this thing called motherhood, how we are all here for each other, and all can relate. It’s truly a blessing and a gift to be a mom and I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.
MINDY KALING, mom to Katherine and Spencer
What’s been the biggest surprise about motherhood so far?
I can’t believe how much I order from Amazon. It’s startling how many packages arrive.
What is something your mother taught you that you hope to pass along to your child?
My mother was very ambitious and chose not to fear the unknown. She moved from India to Africa (by herself in her 20’s in the 1970’s) and then to Boston. I inherited her ambitious side, but I’m still working on my fear of the unknown. Immigrants are such great role models for their kids; they are so brave. I hope to instill those same qualities in my kids.
Describe being a mom in one word…
Thrilling.
What does this day mean to you and how do you plan to celebrate?
Mother’s Day without my mom is kind of sad. She would’ve loved a fancy LA Mother’s Day: brunch at the Bel Air Hotel and my daughter and son wearing fancy little matching outfits, she loved that kind of thing. I used to try to pretend Mother’s Day didn’t make me sad, which only made me feel worse. Now I accept my feelings and try to take my mind off missing her by telling my kids stories about her, and that usually works.